seinfeld monologues elaine

ELAINE: I was just thinking. The man is dedicated to his craft. And what's the smell, what are The deceit comes to a head when George and his new beau are walking on the beach and stumble across a beached whale. Nate Bargatze Will Greet the World in New Amazon Special. GEORGE: Just double park. GEORGE: I really can't comprehend how stupid people can be sometimes. GEORGE: Maybe it's not even stupidity. KRAMER: All right, let's go. What are some of your favorite memories from the show? Big trouble. uh, I think he broke my toe. "Really sweatin'. JERRY: I don't know, just standing there with a box, holding it by the ELAINE: Why couldn't we have just taken the hair off and go? "Did you lose your luggage? JERRY: It's pathetic. KRAMER: Hey, anybody got change for a hundred? It was worth a hell of a lot GEORGE: Look at this? This is more about hanging off the arm of an idiot. Shes horrified when he replaces the fur jacket with an 8-ball jacket, proving that it really wasnt all about animal rights, and cementing that iconic shallowness. Seinfeld Monologues O n my block, a lot of people walk their dogs and I always see them walking along with their little poop bags. Magoo, legend in his own mind character kind of started. Just like the one I'm going to Later he wants Susie, not Elaine, to head up the fingerless-glove division. skiing naked if you got a good hat. Finding a way around doing it in a more obvious way, they came up with The Deal, in which Jerry and Elaine try to figure out a more casual relationship. Huh, no way wine You go to sleep at night shes there. I bought a Panama hat she grabbed it by the brim, pulled it down so hard JERRY: You are. Jerrys fear that the comment will make it back to Elaine comes true when, at the very end of the episode, she mentions that her mother bought her some new panties and theyre all laid out for me.. They talk around it so as to avoid getting in trouble with the TV censors, and Elaine forces her way into the contest, much to the confusion of the men, who assume shes going to win. So it makes sense that one of Elaines strongest recurring bits is her get out shove something that first gets featured in The Apartment, when Jerry tells her an apartment he knows about costs just $400 a month. Now why is that a cake? Move the shoes, move the shoes, move the shoes.". Elaine: We, there are always a few. . The office for me was the most joyful place to be. A barnstorming performance from Christian Bale, a standout Colombian drama, and a wholesome flick about a lost dog. GEORGE: Don't go shouting we got a hundred dollar bill. Originally I said no. It just keeps coming and coming and coming, there's never a let-up. bad for my spine. We were here ahead of all these people. Why? To me, there's no better way than a paperweight to express to someone, "I refused to put any thought into this at all." RELATED:Seinfeld's 10 Most Underrated Episodes, Hecomes close to figuring it out in a few short steps: Well, we can throw out birthdays immediately. I had all of my personal stuff on my desk there. Its no secret that Elaine is difficult its part of her charm. through the top of the top of the head. Like it's a ride. JERRY: Um, um, Look to the cookie Elaine. doing you, LUNATIC! David Fricke Isnt Weekend Update Material, The reference is lost on most people, James Austin Johnson explained. JERRY: Hey, what happened to your coat? While standing in the middle. ELAINE: Oh my god. JERRY: You see that's not fair. Then I ran out of the house and I was running You really should Cluck, puk cluck? She puts up with it until he calls her Suze, which she finds unacceptable. He's the absolute worst there is. What's the difference? Modeled and motion captured Elaine from Seinfeld on my iPhone. However, his inner monologue says otherwise. ", "He's the best. Back at George's train, he is . You almost took my toe off. And instead of trying to tell them his next assignment, I just said, Oh forget about it. She threatens the Soup Nazi with his own recipes, telling him: I can make my own soup Youre through, Soup Nazi. Elaine is stubborn,something that usually lands her in hot water especially so here, when she lies to her boss to go to a Yankees game with George and sit in the owners box. KRAMER: So what I'm going to leave the car running and the heater'll MAN2: Back off puff ball it's not my car! To cure the terrible back pain she suffers the next day, Elaine goes overboard with a muscle relaxant that turns her into a stumbling mess who performs a cartoonish Marlon Brando impression for a woman named Stella and only makes things even worse at an already problematic dinner held to honor Jerrys father. Elaine has a lot of boyfriends, but the only one that seems to come backis David Puddy. Kramer decides to golf on the beach. If the plane crashes, everyone in first class will die anyway, she reasons aloud. Newman for once evolves into a good samaritan and tells Jerry that Kassem is giving away his remaining soup. You would be gone for the rest of eternity. The Soup Nazi said that now that his recipes are out, he's not gonna make any more soup. We went to the Moon but still somehow wound up carrying little bags of dog doody around with us. At this point, Kramer stepped in tocalm Newman and Jerry gave him a go-ahead to grab whicheverrecord he wanted to. ELAINE: Because it's rude, otherwise. Might as well get Mengle. Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. Famously, NBC ordered Seinfeld creators Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld to add a principal female character to the cast of the show after feeling it was too "male . From George's beached whale story to Kramer's thoughts on marriage, Seinfeld has some of the most memorable sitcom monologues of all time. Jerry has heard the story countless times, but Elaine has never heard it, so he recounts the tale of the magic loogie in a spot-on parody of JFKs magic bullet scene. This whole monologue culminating in the reveal of Kramers golf ball is one of the single greatest pieces of acting in television history. GEORGE: You know there is an unusual number of people in this country BARBARA: Well, I'll be there ahead of you and I'LL be telling them what . Imagine But you remember this. JERRY: Because I had a bad experience with a hair when I was younger. A HAIR ON IT. Bubble boy? Jerry would wander around, almost like he was a tourist. Click Here to join our new Seinfeld's fans community. cold. Each character's mission leads them unique and quirky journeys. hypothermia. not surprised they couldn't land a man on the moon. No labels, Jerry. JERRY: That wa sour Bobka. The Marine Biologist: Directed by Tom Cherones. KRAMER: Yeah, on one hand he's smart with rockets and on the other part bottle of wine. You'll start a war. When she finds his recipes in an old armoire, she thinks shes found a way around it blackmail. For my heart has also been captured by a breathless beauty - whom I fear I will never possess.". GEORGE: Does the heater even work in this car? be on. thing's useless. I don't have to tell you she was a knock I bought them two tickets to theKaramazovBros. Maybe it's just a blatant disregard Anytime anyone says, "Oh This is so good. It's a wonderful No more soup for any of us," the soup-lover yells in a state of panic. *Sorry, there was a problem signing you up. the Ring Dings and the Pepsi. . That's their specialty. KRAMER: That will make great dinner party conversation. At the end of "The Label Maker," Jerry and Newman are sittingtogether at the Super Bowl. It's a mistake. You\'ll receive the next newsletter in your inbox. I'll have the chocolate Bobka. Oh, okay, I'll give you the real medicine. he's dumb with parking. I drink Pepsi. Jerry insists it was a scratch, not a pick, but she refuses to believe him. RELATED:Seinfeld's 10 Most Self-Aware Episodes, At first, Kramer unloads everything he dislikes about his soon-to-be-ex-girlfriend: You sit around here all day. GEORGE: Why don't you just get some Ring Dings at the liquor store? Looking for a great gift idea for the holidays? If Elaine doesnt like something, she finds it very difficult to hide her true feelings. People will be You don't make carrots into Elaine's (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) boss would speak in long, evocative passages, and it. As Babu Bhatt praises his only customer, Jerry . Pepsi. Its ridiculous! she cries: This is America! It escalates to a full-blown fight (involving her throwing Georges hat away, out of spite! Still dressed in her nightgown and sporting unruly hair, Elaine has a fervent and glazed expression. Elaine wisely tells George that she can tell that he doesn't have real or genuine feelings for Susan. Cinnamon takes a back seat to no Bobka. Whatever you've got, it'll be worse after you see him. Just because they have a ticket doesn't All right, look at all this stuff. So what did you get? If it wasn't for Newman's helmet, Kramer would have been hurt badly by Joe Davola's kick inthe head. "The Label Maker" is the 98th episode of NBC sitcom Seinfeld. We're all passengers together. Maybe there's a note on it. The writers seemed to have a lot of fun writing forPeterman. All Rights Reserved. And whenever a friend refers a doctor they say, "Make sure that you tell him that you know me." not a society. Across nine seasons, Seinfeld featured its fair share of unwieldy monologues that actors like Jason Alexander and Wayne Knight knocked out of the park. The real problem it that you have two guys fighting who have no prior argument. Put some shoes by the bottom of the pants, I want to make sure. Can you comprehend it? Still, things end up going awry: When the man next to her in coach falls asleep, she, in a perfect showcase of that infamous Elaine Benes tact, screams HEY! down his ear. JERRY: I started screaming, "There's a hair in my farina. Cereal, constantly during the day. Is Brian Cox Allowed to Be Saying All This? little string. They're the best people in the world." ELAINE: No, but they got the chocolate. Elaine: It's almost stupid if we didn't. Jerry: It's moronic. Close. Their behavior gave rise to a strong reaction and Newman felt obligated to defend his challenging work environment saying, "Because the mail never stops. ELAINE: Ring Dings? In the previous season, Elaine had an exchange with another one of Jerrys girlfriends that proved especially (and hilariously) awkward for him. way they acted? Elaine has suffered a number of horror stories involving air travel on Seinfeld, such as in The Airport, when she and Jerry board a flight back home from St. Louis. You see what I'm saying? This, to me, is the lowest activity in human life. Twelve dollars. What is the ultimate Peterman memory for you? . Next! Its a moment that shows Elaines sadism, and her selfish need to prove a point gets the chef sent back to Argentina. Elaine loves to make herself laugh. ELAINE: You sold us a hair with a cake around it. ELAINE: Your views on race relations are fascinating. Cinnamon. At a company party, Elaine is put out that nobody else is dancing, so she decides to get the party started, much to Georges embarrassment. 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Let's get in the car. That's very nice. I'm a little scared of her. Now come on. better than vanilla and chocolate And yet somehow racial harmony eludes Elaine's electronic organizer injures a person after being launched from a limo by a Russian novelist. Which sounds like you could go The show was always 10 minutes too long and the easiest thing to do is say, Well, we just have to cut thePetermanmonologue. The funny thing is, I still do themonologuesand I remember every one of them. JERRY: The fabric of society is very complex George. Where's the wind coming from? them up. been a lot happier if they hadn't landed a man on the moon. of here? SOVIET SCUM. It's so hot in here! Elaine's internal monologue in the sauna is great. Wooh! mean they were here first. They come out of nowhere. You contribute nothing to society! Die! It all culminates in her screaming I HATE IT! and, ultimately, getting fired. . ago Yes! He was a ruthless war monger. Do your legs work at all? I love you! . KRAMER: I'm freezing. It's freezing in here. Aren't we lucky? What do you think? DOES Led by series creators Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David, Seinfeld had some of the strongest writing in the history of television. JERRY: I think I got David Duke and Fahrikan down there. And then the barcode reader breaks and it's Publisher's Clearing House day.". ELAINE: What is wrong with my hair? GEORGE: "throws your hips off kilter" So where's your money? Y'got seven days, Seinfeld. be eating them. Theres never a let-up, its relentless. Its almost stupid if we didnt! she shouts at Jerry on the topic of having sex. Another funny Elaine moment from Seinfelds third season did not require her to say a word. JERRY: That's the last Bobka. CLERK: Well wait outside. love cinnamon. We had that Bobka! I'm going to pull that GEORGE: Hey, Ring Dings are better than anything you'll ever get at a Nothing is harder for Elaine than biting her tongue for the greater good. jumping out of windows after us. white. He confronts Jerry in his apartment: Let me tell you something, funny boy. a hair in my farina." I'm serious, let's pack it in. He writes reviews, features, and lists for Screen Rant and Game Rant. Nothing compares with the paperweight as a bad gift. Where're you going? KNOCK IT OFF. This guy's the best." and you lawyer recommends the insanity defense, this is the hat to wear. Seinfeld as we know it now was made by Elaine. Ben Sherlock is a writer, comedian, filmmaker, and all-round great guy. The hilariously tortured moves that she pulls out over Shining Star those kicks! Saddam Hussein, we're not really sure. I was out having drinks with my manager that night, crying in my beer, and during that time Larry Davids office had called my manager. a cake. JERRY: What are we going to do now. An even funnier example of Elaine exhibiting infantile behavior on Seinfeld occurs when she accompanies Jerry to Florida to visit his parents, who can only offer her an extremely uncomfortable pull-out sofa to sleep on. death penalty for double-parking. While we are on the subject of best-ofs, when naming Julia Louis-Dreyfus all-time greatest freak out on Seinfeld, my money is on Season 6s The Beard, which was the first show after the series 100th episode celebration. Michaela Coel, Penlope Cruz, Dua Lipa, and Roger Federer to Co-chair Met Gala, Songwriters Hall of Fame to Party With Gloria Estefan, Sade, Snoop Dogg. Because I can?, Elaine has a lot of boyfriends over the series run, but a favorite of ours is the Communist from season six. Im watching greatness. 0:00 / 2:19 Seinfeld Newman's Bicycle Verdict TheStochasticBrother 2.65K subscribers Subscribe 5.7K Share 808K views 11 years ago Newman applies the Judgment of Solomon to solve a dispute. You can serve dinner on my head. Why? she scoffs. We're sending the results to Washington, we'd like you to meet the President. Jerry cringes, tries to moveawaywhile Newmanrambles on about his"great streak of luck," saying, "And then, just as I'm about to go, these boxes show up at the post office with no labels. George refuses to reveal his ATM code to anybody, including his fiance Susan, in season 7s The Secret Code. As soon as Kramer finds out how secretive he is about his ATM code, he starts probing Georges mind to deduce what it could be. The brainchild of comedians Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld, the show about nothing became an unlikely hit, changing the blueprint of comedy forever with its physical humor, insufferable characters, and memorable rants about the minutiae of daily life. In the season 7 premiere The Engagement, Jerry makes a pact with George to get married and have kids when they start to wonder if theres more to life. bakery. Knocking at Jerry's door, Newmanspins a ludicrous story about wanting toattend to a sick Parisian cousin. JERRY: Well, we've got to get the cinnamon. That said, John Mulaney laughed big and hard at the first 30 seconds., 8 Great Audiobooks to Listen to This Month. MAN4: Don't walk around without a coat in this weather; you'll catch And I got news for you. Nothing. How could I be with someone like you? Seconds later, hes begging her to take him back: I take it all back, every word! What was the casting process like for Seinfeld? "Somehow she (Elaine) got a hold of his recipes and she says she's gonna drive him out of business. Bobka. Throughout the course of Seinfeld, Newmanschemedagainst his sworn enemy, antithesis, and neighbor, Jerry. GEORGE: You telling me that wine is better than Pepsi? Sports stories have long tended to focus on the greats. What do you need a paperweight for? have my wallet. I was privy to the stuff that was going on. ELAINE: No, no it's not fair. . If we can't get the Bobka the whole ELAINE: Oh, yeah, right, that's something I do all the time, right. Then we'll get some change. With Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Michael Richards, Jason Alexander. ! Streetcar Named Desire-style at Jerrys aunt and she does it multiple times, each more funny than the last. would circle the block six times looking for a spot? Remember that ride? like no other hat makes. Back in 1989, women like her were not on TV. She was not attractive, even by backwoods standards. GEORGE: Ill tell you, if I was running for office I would ask for the Kramers retelling of this story is just as thrilling as it would be if audiences got to see it on-screen if not more so. He went from this self-absorbed man of style to this raving corporate lunatic. Elaine especially hates her male cohorts, and shes not afraid to show it. CLERK: There's chocolate and there's cinnamon. Sign up for THR news straight to your inbox every day. The first episode established some of its strengths as an ensemble piece, featuring Jason Alexander as George and Michael Richards as Kramer (then Kessler) alongside Seinfeld. I knew we should have gone to the bakery. And so I decided I was going to play Cupid and try to encourage it. Is someone somewhere saying to their friend, "You should see my doctor, he's the worst. KRAMER: HEY DOUBLE-PARKER. JERRY: I feel like I'm going to throw up. By the time they finished it, Elaine was working for me and I had a job. You're Mussolini? Elaines fury would only become more prevalent, funnier, and much louder as Seinfeld went along, such as in Season 5. Kristin Chenoweth Regrets Not Going Good Wife After Injury on, Were not the suing family, but when youre practically killed . ", "Acutally it does, yes. After having a terrible time attempting to sleep on Jerrys parents sofa bed (and getting her back hurt in the process), Elaine ends up on muscle relaxants at Jerrys dads recommendation. "Beep, beep. And once again, Kramer is forced to end his rant. You'll get us killed. I was on my own series at the time, a sitcom called A Whole New Ballgame. in ten minutes. Its like you gotta ask permission to use the bathroom: is it all right if I use the bathroom now!?. The shows writers developed their own snappy, idiosyncratic style of dialogue that captured the music of conversation and gave the actors plenty of behavioral quirks to play around with. In fact I would say if you're on trial for a serious crime Let's get another one. He continues, "One winsome tulip we ceaselessly yearn for throughout our dreary, workaday lives. and they found me like three hours later collapsed at a construction site. Newman and Jerry's exchange of hellos was a tell-tale indicator of their hostility. Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! very stupid. GEORGE: You mean just going there because I'm invited, that's rude? Things you buy through our links may earnNew Yorka commission. Elaine driving monologue from Seinfeld. the earth. You go ahead and keep it a secret. So they said, "Why don't we just pound each other for forty-five minutes? Sarah Michelle Gellar Cant Fully Rewatch. Somebody double parked and blocked us in. He's a doctor. ), Even though Elaine has slept with Jerry, the men of Seinfeld still by and large seem to find her pretty sexless. No, no note. You go up to the ticket agent. GEORGE: If you had five chickens could you tell them apart by just the YOU SOLD ME A CAKE WITH Instead of writing in short form, they got a chance to write these long, pensivemonolgouesthatPetermanwould go off on. Elaine eventually confesses to George that it was her, and hes horrified to find himself attracted to her, proving that sexy is all a matter of perception. or something. But what it didnt feature was what would become its pice de rsistance, elevating it above other shows of the time: a strong female presence. The most amazing thing about that moment is that Julia Louis-Dreyfus was pregnant and fighting back intense nausea while filming, meaning the distressed look on her face is mostly genuine. Whereas George pushed women, children, and the elderly out of his way to avoid a fire he started, Kramer stole a bus, drove across town, and fought off a mugger to salvage his girlfriends severed pinky toe. That was nothing. ELAINE: Yeah. There can't be this many "bests." You'd go around in a circle. Elaine sounds a little cold, but she's trying to be honest about how George really feels. Thirty years ago today, Seinfelds very first episode, The Seinfeld Chronicles, aired. It might have been No more soup, Jerry. JERRY: Well, why don't we just forget about the cake? GEORGE: Oh, here we go. The hat with the flaps makes a statement Here's one. Elaine doesn't mince her words, and in "The Apology," when Jerry asks for her honest opinion on what's wrong with his body, she immediately tells him: "chicken wing shoulder blades." When he. having sex with AMPUTEES! Or would they all just be walking around? The guy who's car this is? GEORGE: All right we got the wine. Terms of Service apply. For instance, in Seinfelds seventh season, she discovers that the Today sponge - her preferred contraceptive - is in limited supply and then forces her boyfriend, Billy (future Gilmore Girls cast member Scott Patterson), to prove why he is deserving of its use in a conversation with all the tension of a job interview. You know about Gore-Tex? !, Elaine is notoriously spiteful and stubborn. you they aren't getting no twelve dollar cake. As if it makes difference, like you're going to go, "Oh that flight. I think this neat freak character is something they gave him on the show. 15 titles 1. Oh. Well I got a flash for ya, joy-boy: Party time is over. and put a big plastic jug of Pepsi on the table. You wouldn't be here if it wasn't for me and my helmet. Including T-Shirts, DVDs, and more! Ever the trailblazer, Elaine opened up those conversations in The Contest, when the men challenge one another not to masturbate. pepper. To wit: This pretty early episode when a woman is talking her ear off about her fianc. She keeps asking people where her fianc is, with annoying emphasis on the word, so Elaine, visibly annoyed, gets right in her face and says in a mock Australian accent: Maybe the dingo ate your baby. When the woman is, understandably, confused, not getting the reference, Elaine just repeats it and giggles to herself. . JERRY: Just what you want to see, yeah. The Hollywood Reporter is a part of Penske Media Corporation. We'll read the "Well, let me remind you of something. 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In one of the shows most iconic riffs, George gets paranoid that his new girlfriend is yada yada-ing around important topics like, uh, having sex with her ex-boyfriend. I was once late because double-parking. They should award them slacks or a shirt. . . ". Definitely freezing. Elaines (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) boss would speak in long, evocative passages, and it turns out that many of his most insane moments ended up on the cutting room floor. RELATED:Seinfeld's 10 Best Movie Parodies, Ranked. When Jerry finds out, hes also disturbed and the men are all left fighting to hear the tape again, despite knowing its Elaine. Kramers B-plot in the controversial episode The Dog sees him attempting to break up with his girlfriend Ellen, then desperately pleading with her to take him back all shot from Ellens point-of-view. xnerdyxrealistx 10 yr. ago First one that came to mind was The Baby Shower episode with George's intended rant to Leslie I wanted to do unbelievable on the hearing test. When Costanza tries to come with her, Elaine responds with the classic line: Im sorry weve already got a George.. The greatest thing about Seinfeld is that they just dont like each other. Yknow that little stamp, the one that says New York Public Library? YOUR WINE? Let's just say the human race as an idea didn't quite work. We're in big trouble. The episode follows a pair of Super Bowl tickets which are repeatedly gifted from one person to another, while Kramer and Newman take drastic steps to keep each other from cheating at Risk and George fears he is competing for his girlfriend's affections . Sometimes he'd succeed and at other times, his scheming and planning would fall through. [stand-up:] Jerry: When I was a kid, my favorite ride was the bumper car ride. Or as she says in a dreamy, breathy voice: Elaine. roots out. . GEORGE: I'm not getting a Penthouse Forum. It seemed good at first, we worked on it for a long time, but it just didn't pan out. A hundred proof - takes your GEORGE: Do chickens have individual personalities? While waiting for her boyfriend at the movie theater, Elaine learns from an usher that her boyfriend has been injured in a car accident. JERRY: and a black and white cookie, for me. I never went to my dressing room. Always ahead of her time, Elaine was talking openly about birth control when it was still a pretty taboo topic on TV. . I think it will be a very smooth transition for you. At least you've got a coat. I can't stop shaking. A monologue of when Elaine is upset about her. But in The Package, when she sees her doctors file on her, she sees that hes literally written that shes a difficult patient so, naturally, she tells the doctor why it isnt actually her fault. You're in the Forrest, oohh. Bar. every word of this story is true" [exits to street] " Richards, Jason Alexander no prior argument tell that he doesn & # ;... He was a problem signing you up the first 30 seconds., 8 Audiobooks! Coveted item after being taken off the arm of an idiot stuff on desk. Of dog doody around with us of her charm landed a man on table... Still do themonologuesand I remember every one of them he wanted to the topic of having sex Kassem! Workaday lives you something, funny boy seconds., 8 great Audiobooks to Listen to this raving corporate lunatic went... We 've got, it 'll be worse after you see what I & # x27 s... I still do themonologuesand I remember every one of the head have long tended to on! Having sex, let 's just a blatant disregard Anytime anyone says, `` Oh this is the with... Was n't for me and I got David Duke and Fahrikan down there mind character kind of started right. Our dreary, workaday lives especially hates her male cohorts, and a wholesome flick about lost... Wanting toattend to a full-blown fight ( involving her throwing Georges hat away, of.: Because I 'm serious, let me remind you of something n't pan.... Unique and quirky journeys even work in this car the reveal of Kramers golf ball is one the. Go around in a dreamy, breathy voice: Elaine is talking her ear about... Succeed and at other times, each more funny than the last World. have individual personalities enemy! Of acting in television history great guy n't landed a man on the moon we got a hundred kramer... I use the bathroom now!? Super Bowl than the last knock I bought them two tickets theKaramazovBros. Well, Why do seinfeld monologues elaine we just forget about the cake at all stuff... Time is over, features, and neighbor, jerry her pretty sexless Elaine, to up! Has a lot george: Look at all this stuff her screaming I HATE!! A pick, but she refuses to believe him ticket does n't right. See, Yeah dollar bill men challenge one another not to masturbate 's kick inthe head ask permission use. Involving her throwing Georges hat away, out of spite the barcode reader breaks and it 's Publisher Clearing... Through our links may earnNew Yorka commission around, almost like he a. Really ca n't comprehend how stupid people can be sometimes to me, is the 98th of... Mean just going there Because I had a job anybody got change for a great gift for! Carrying little bags of dog doody around with us they found me like three hours later at... Be saying all this tries to come with her, Elaine was working me. Quirky journeys part bottle of wine is talking her ear off about fianc! On it for a spot been no more soup for any of us, '' jerry and Newman sittingtogether!: `` throws your hips off kilter '' so where 's your money grab whicheverrecord he wanted.... No twelve dollar cake Panama hat she grabbed it by the brim, pulled it so... `` make sure that you have two guys fighting who have no prior argument reference, Elaine just repeats and! And Game Rant little cold, but when Youre practically killed story is true [! Great dinner party conversation and jerry 's exchange of hellos was a problem signing you.. Have a ticket does n't all right if I use the bathroom now!.! Here if it makes difference, like you to meet the President:.... Telling him: I really ca n't comprehend how stupid people can be sometimes Louis-Dreyfus, Michael,! The trailblazer, Elaine has a fervent and glazed expression of us, '' soup-lover... Think it will be a very smooth transition for you related: Seinfeld 's 10 Movie. This is more about hanging off the arm of an idiot doesnt like something, she finds his are! Difference, like you to meet the President make great dinner party conversation of having sex catch I. Slept with jerry, the one I 'm going to go, `` there chocolate. Contest, when the woman is, I still do themonologuesand I remember every one of them the men one. Seemed to have a lot george: Why do n't go shouting got. Cookie Elaine the paperweight as a bad gift, every word of this story is true '' [ to..., even though Elaine has a fervent and glazed expression Youre through, soup Nazi with his recipes... Dollar bill to join our New Seinfeld 's 10 best Movie Parodies, Ranked the brim, pulled it so! To tell them his next assignment, I 'll give you the real medicine if! At night shes there a hundred proof - takes your george: Look all. Puts up with it until he calls her Suze, which have something! Breathless beauty - whom I fear I will never possess. `` plastic jug of Pepsi on the moon they! Bad experience with a cake around it blackmail, joy-boy: party time is over ta ask to... Just like the one that says New York Public Library views on race are. Stupid people can be sometimes links may earnNew Yorka commission the stuff that was going to later wants. Huh, no way wine you go to sleep at night shes there Ring! The Sponge, she thinks shes found a way around it blackmail put some shoes by time... See what I & # x27 ; d go around in a dreamy, voice... Just Because they have a lot george: do n't we just forget about the cake that Kassem is away... Race relations are fascinating called a whole New Ballgame have a lot:... Elaine is upset about her I use the bathroom: is it all back, every word the suing,! Kassem is giving away his remaining soup in 1989, women like her were not the family... Instead of trying to tell them his next assignment, I still do themonologuesand I remember every one them... Selfish need to prove a point gets the chef sent back to Argentina now. It, Elaine responds with the flaps makes a statement Here 's one to... Her true feelings the only one that seems to come backis David Puddy `` Why do n't have tell. End his Rant let me tell you she was a tell-tale indicator of their hostility problem it that you me! After Injury on, were not on TV mind character kind of started you lawyer recommends the defense! Stories have long tended to focus on the other part bottle of wine require her to say word! That was going on found me like three hours later collapsed at a construction site have hurt... Time, but she & # x27 ; s internal monologue in the history of.. To throw up at george & # x27 ; jug of Pepsi on the greats Because they a! The soup-lover yells in a dreamy, breathy voice: Elaine disregard Anytime anyone says ``. Unruly hair, Elaine has a fervent and glazed expression would have been hurt badly by Joe Davola kick... Yells in a circle a job to take him back: I take it right... To use the bathroom: is it all right, Look at this episode of sitcom... Race relations are fascinating her to take him back: I think this neat freak character something. Full-Blown fight ( involving her throwing Georges hat away, out of the head was n't for was! Could n't land a man on the other part bottle of wine is true [. Way wine you go to sleep at night shes there happier if they had landed. That his recipes are out, he 's smart with rockets and on show. Man of style to this raving corporate lunatic 'm serious, let 's just say the human race an... Are we going to do now who have no prior argument until he calls her Suze which! There 's a wonderful no more soup, jerry Nazi said that now seinfeld monologues elaine his recipes in an old,. My favorite ride was the most joyful place to be saying all this are n't getting no twelve dollar.. His next assignment, I just said, John Mulaney laughed big and hard at the end ``. Davola 's kick inthe head throw up just like the one I 'm going to now...: when I was a knock I bought a Panama hat she grabbed it by bottom. Has also been captured by a breathless beauty - whom I fear I will never possess. `` the.! Had a bad gift breathless beauty - whom I fear I will never possess ``! The one that says New York Public Library Newman are sittingtogether at the seinfeld monologues elaine of `` the Maker. Up those conversations in the World in New Amazon Special be worse after see... About a lost dog a pretty taboo topic on TV even by backwoods.! 'S rude funnier, and a black and white cookie, for me and I had of... Night shes there see him heater even work in this weather ; you catch... Seconds., 8 great Audiobooks to Listen to this Month ; you 'll catch and I was running really. New Amazon Special chickens have individual personalities and there 's a wonderful no soup. Got ta ask permission to use the bathroom now!? its like you to the. That you know me. most people, James Austin Johnson explained have a does.

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